Oh Boy

I have had a very stressful few days. Especially my Sunday was not pleasant in the beginning. I don't want to go into depth about it, or actually say what the problem is at all but I know something has to be done. Even if i don't want to do anything about it. I'm going to set some rules and boundaries that I feel need to be set.

I am also making a 1 year plan for myself so I am capable of taking care of myself and the kids if need be. And if I never have to be on my own, then the extra income will be lovely for when Brian's job is not doing so well.

I wish I had someone to talk about this with. But I don't. No one would understand my position. I'm on my own with this.

what it is

I have been thinking about a lot lately. Seeing all these people come together for a single family. Literally feeling and seeing all this love and support has been amazing. I was apart of it to be a good friend, but I had no idea this would soon become another family to me. I let my gard down in so many ways, opened myself so to many people. When normally I wouldn't have.
It's just made me think, about a lot. If something bad was to happen to me would I have the same outcome? And honestly I think not.( I know my immediate family would be there of course) I have been assessing my friendships with different people, and our relationships and they are just not all that strong. I barely even know who they actually are, and none of them know me at all.
I know someone might read this and get all upset. But it is, to me, true. Maybe I have a different definition of friendships than most people, I'm not sure.
All I know for sure is that I am so glad to be able to be there the best I can for the people I love. And I am so glad I have grown closer, and stronger towards certain people.
I feel my life, my friendships, and my outlooks changing...for the better, and in a direction I know will be better for not only myself but for my family.

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mother lion

At least that's what Brian called me today.
My son got bit in the head by my sister in laws dog today. And while he pretty much just got scared and has a small bruse, I tried not to make a big deal out of it. But I am mad
Like really mad. And the more I think about it, and the more I picture it happening....the more I hope that dog dies. Not even joking, I see that bruse on my babys head the more I am praying that dog dies soon...Idk if that's a little harsh, but there it is.
Never are my kids to go to her house again without me there to watch them, until that dog is gone.

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wht

Why pre-discuss if your not going to follow through anyways? Bull shit

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